12:46am... get out of bed to snuggle my crying baby back to sleep
12:53am... lightly kick Dusty with my foot so he gets up to quiet our crying baby
12:54am... moderately kick Dusty with the same foot to remind him of the crying baby
12:55am... throw a pillow at snoring Dusty, yell in my raspy voice that Bentley needs some help getting back to sleep, and begin coughing like an old lady
1:07am... get myself out of bed to comfort a crying baby again, but not without giving in to the off-limits bottle of milk my Dr. so readily suggest we go cold turkey with
1:15am... startled out of my near-sleep to the sound of a burp, a cough, then a loud coo... someone was ready to play
1:42am... I make a mental note to take the crib toy out of Bentley's bed so it can't keep me up all night, but then I quickly erase the note reminding myself that the purpose of the toy is to buy me some time so he doesn't need me in the middle of the night
2:35am... hack something furious from the depths of my lungs and stumble around for some water to ease my parched throat
4:14am... another coughing episode
6:30am... MY alarm goes off, which it rarely does, then I silently thank Bentley for playing with my phone the day before and setting my alarm, otherwise Dusty would have overslept 2 hours instead of 1... kick Dusty and tell him he's way late for work
6:36am... Dusty kisses me on the head and says "babe, you should probably shower or take a bath today." I reply with a hiss "I've showered every day since I've been sick, thank you!" I can't help it that this stupid fever makes me sweat in my sleep.
6:40am... Dusty slams the door while rushing off to work waking both boys and giving me a good morning headache
6:42am... open the fridge door with 2 whining children at my feet and realize the milk is nearly gone... make a quick decision to give one kid the milk and one kid watered down heavy cream... still don't know which kid got what
6:45am... mentally prepare to venture out with my chest cold and my 2 wild boys to pick up milk at the grocery store later in the morning
7:01am... missing my coffee but knowing hot tea is better when I'm sick
7:14am... Fresh Beat Band
7:43am... more Fresh Beats
8:10am... shower and pretend I don't see Ryder eating bobbi pins from my bedside table or Bentley picking things out of the trashcan next to the toilet
8:55am... put B down for a morning nap even if he won't sleep because I can't go another minute chasing after both
9:21am... Ryder asks why he can't have milk
9:43am... Ryder asks why he can't have milk
10:01am... Ryder asks why he can't have milk
10:21am... Bentley is finally awake so I don't have to explain to Ryder anything else about milk
10:37am... get the boys dressed and wrangled out into the garage so I can load up the laundry and head off to get milk
11am... boys all buckled, a hint of makeup on my face so I don't look too dead, and we're ready to go... oops! the car died right there in the driveway... dead battery? no, gas tank empty... I haven't driven my car since last week...
11:03am... boys back into the garage, more crying for milk
11:07am... call Dusty... no answer
11:09am... call Dusty... no answer... leave a message
11:11am... call my mom... please help!
11:47am... Grannie shows up with milk!
11:53am... "Mommy, there's poop! Right there! Eeewwwww!"
11:55am... I find another poop pebble on the couch
11:57am... "Mommy, there's poop on Beddays bankie! Eeewwww!"
11:59am... more poop on the floor
... and I'm pooped!